I'm a Colganite, me
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
The highlight of my monthly NUJ branch meeting last night was a short talk by Jenny Colgan on getting your first book deal. (This is a subject of as much interest to a room full of freelance journalists as it is to anyone else, of course.) Much of what she said is repeated in the FAQ on her website but you don't get to hear her lovely Scottish accent or her giggling.
On the topic of the huge number of submissions received by publishers and agents, she assured us that 97% of all manuscripts delivered are evidence, not of any latent talent within the writer, but only of the writer's complete psychosis. Apparently, most of these submissions involve Jesus and prove that a writer is, against all the odds, more than someone who writes. These people have, after all, completed a novel, which is astounding. What is more astounding is that they have completed a novel without any ability to write.
I suppose this is the equivalent of the sad crowds of hopefuls who attend the auditions for shows like the X-Factor and whose talents fall frighteningly short of their ambitions. With many of these, however, you get the impression that this could be the first time they've actually tried singing. To complete a novel of about 100,000 words does is at least testament to a degree of determination and stamina, however misguided.
In the wake of several other inspiring comments from Jenny I came away from the meeting determined to become a Colganite practitioner. Briefly, this means I shall do the following:
I shall report back as soon as possible on the advance I receive from the publisher my agent selects.
Jenny's books are all available from Amazon, inevitably. I have yet to read one but after hearing her speak I'm tempted to try her first one, Amanda's Wedding.
On the topic of the huge number of submissions received by publishers and agents, she assured us that 97% of all manuscripts delivered are evidence, not of any latent talent within the writer, but only of the writer's complete psychosis. Apparently, most of these submissions involve Jesus and prove that a writer is, against all the odds, more than someone who writes. These people have, after all, completed a novel, which is astounding. What is more astounding is that they have completed a novel without any ability to write.
I suppose this is the equivalent of the sad crowds of hopefuls who attend the auditions for shows like the X-Factor and whose talents fall frighteningly short of their ambitions. With many of these, however, you get the impression that this could be the first time they've actually tried singing. To complete a novel of about 100,000 words does is at least testament to a degree of determination and stamina, however misguided.
In the wake of several other inspiring comments from Jenny I came away from the meeting determined to become a Colganite practitioner. Briefly, this means I shall do the following:
- Complete only three chapters of a novel
- Make sure I know what the novel is about and how to describe it as a high concept (Jenny's example was for her novel Where have all the boys gone? which she pitched as Sex in the City meets Balamory)
- Make a list of agents who represent writers I like
- Make sure those agents are not small or single-handed operations
- Write a brief letter to each of these agents offering my three chapters (with the high concept pitch included)
I shall report back as soon as possible on the advance I receive from the publisher my agent selects.
Jenny's books are all available from Amazon, inevitably. I have yet to read one but after hearing her speak I'm tempted to try her first one, Amanda's Wedding.
